Intentional Habits

It’s not enough to just want a great life. 

It’s a decision to focus what we do each day on building the experience of life we want.

The issue is…..we all are designed to create habits.

Some are very helpful.

And some… they aren’t necessarily working for us.

(Some can downright mess us up, right?) 

But We Get To Fix That

One of the most important Tools to add to your Intentional Living Toolbox is the power to intentionally create new habits that drive your unconscious actions towards the experience of life you want.

Enter B.J. Fogg

Stanford Professor, Behavioral Scientist and Author, B. J. Fogg, has spent years working to understand how we can intentionally create new habits that truly help us change our lives for the better.

Fogg’s methods are deceivingly simple. They remove “will power” from the process, and make installing new habits easy, based upon a cornerstone of Tiny.

Often that can mean really tiny, so we start embedding the new behavior in a very small, bit sized way, steering clear of anxiety and self-doubt. 

I’ve found his work so powerful I’ve incorporated his methods into The Power Of Intentional Living Membership journey.

His techniques give us a very adaptable, powerful way to assure new life choices turn into a lasting reality change. Ie. truly Stick. 

Get An Edge On Changing Life For The Better

If you’d like to get a jump start on one of the powerful tools you’ll learn within the TPIL Membership, I have a link to his book below.

It’s offered in whatever way you soak up knowledge best:

Physical print, digital (kindle) or the Audible version (which BJ Fogg reads and adds additional background not found in the print additions).

Just choose the one that fits you best and I bet you’ll find this journey very worthwhile.

Enjoy this truly breakthrough method, based upon years of solid behavioral research, and a lot of real life testing and refinement. (thanks to over 40,000 people so far!)

Start having fun intentionally adding one consistent, positive daily experience into your life!

One that will make your life, your business or your relationships work better and better every day.

Because You were born to have a Vibrant, Connected, Happy life.

(Really!)

Isn’t it time to take charge of the internal software and start telling it to create the experience of life you’ve chosen, instead of the one being randomly dished out when you don’t?

You can check out B.J. Foggs wonderful book “Tiny Habits” below.

Cheers, 

Paul

PS: It would be awesome to hear about your experiences when you put what you’ve learned in play in your life.

Please let me know at: AskUs@ThePowerOfIntentionalLiving.com or on our Facebook Page: ThePowerOfIntentionalLiving 

Paul A. Good MM, MEd
Founder
ThePowerOfIntentionalLiving.com
AskUs@ThePowerOfIntentionalLiving.com
Visit me on Facebook/Instagram/IGTV: ThePowerOfIntentionalLiving

Click The Image To View The Book On Amazon

Click Image To View Book On Amazon

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Even When They’re Not A Natural Fit.

The trick is to find an “Access Point” to do it anyway.

The Video Version

A powerful benefit of being clear on what talents we bring to life, is the ability to use those talents as “Access Points” to accomplish things we should do, but don’t like to.

The personal “Owner’s Manual” you create in The ILM is a powerful tool.

It helps you stay focused on where you’re likely to find the most fulfillment and add the most value to the world in daily life.

Still, we don’t want to use this knowledge as an excuse to simply not do things we should do, but don’t naturally like to do.

When we do, we often cheat ourselves of valuable growth and others of significant residual benefits.

Here’s an example of a creative trick (An Access Point) I used to take on a task I had no passion for doing, but turned into something I have fun doing.

What’s For Dinner?

My wife always took responsibility for planning and making meals.

But she works a much less flexible schedule than I do.

Even though I was never “into cooking,” it suddenly (finally!) dawned on me that it was crazy she was coming home from work around dinner time and then taking on making dinner!

So, one night I asked her: “How about I take over planning and making dinner for us from now on, starting tomorrow?”

After being momentarily stunned that I wanted to take this on, she almost instantly said ” Yes, that would be really great!”

Enter The Holy Crap Moment

Oops…now I was all in.

I knew what I was doing was the right thing, but how was I going to “get into” cooking from now on?

It seemed like a steep climb, so I immediately started looking at how I could leverage my strengths to create a way to “get into” it.

One of my strengths is “transforming something strong into something superb,”* and I’m very visually oriented. (*ref. the Strengths assessment tool used within the ILM)

So I thought, “What could I do to make creating meals fun for me, if I didn’t have an interest in making the actual food?”

My solution: Make every meal “look” beautiful.

I decided to make the appearance of every plated dish the focus, creating a visual composition for each meal, especially as I was learning healthy combinations and how to work with flavors…

And how to not turn fish and chicken into a rubber product!

So How’d It Go?

Now, almost two years later, I make our dinners at least five days a week, have removed the pressure of this necessity from my wonderful wife’s “To Do” list, and most importantly, made her feel more appreciated.

Plus, I get to surprise her every evening with a new, visually attractive (and most times good tasting) meal that connects with me creatively.

I even take on those “meal in a box” deliveries once in a while, to help expand my knowledge of spices and combinations, creating new possibilities.

To paraphrase Thomas Edison: “The moment you think you’ve exhausted all the possibilities, you haven’t.”

An Easy Method To Change Your Perspective

What are things in your life that you should do, but dodge, because you really don’t want to?

Here’s A Method You Can Use To More Quickly Make A Connection Between Something You “Should” do, And Something You Love To Do:

Four Simple Steps:

1.) Make Three Quick Columns On A Piece Of Paper (yup, draw two semi-straight lines down the paper to divide it into three sections.)

2.) Add These Titles To The Top Of Each Column:

Column #1: What I Should Do, But Don’t Want To

Column #2: My Most Powerful Strengths

Column #3: Ways To Connect Them

Don’t Add Anything To The Columns Yet.

Flip the paper and make the Column #1 (Should Do) list on the back of the paper so you can just flow them out to see them.

Now Pick The One Item That Will Be Easiest For You To Accomplish. (This is not an Ironman Challenge, it’s a Get Your Feet Wet and Have Some Fun Exercise to get you familiar with the process. So start with small weights and work up.)

3.) In Column #2: List Your Most Powerful Strengths. (If you’re in the ILM, use the Strengths section in your “Personal Owner’s Manual™” If not (yet), write down what you feel from experience are your most dominant strengths. The talents you seem to use most often when you’re doing something you love to do.

4.) In Column #3, “blue sky” fun and/or wacky ways you can link the task in Column #1 to one or more of the Strengths you listed to accomplish the task.

5). Start doing the task in Column #1 using those strengths!

That’s  what I did in my “Holy Crap” moment and you can do the same.

And have Fun with it! The more silliness your create as you do it, the better.

The mission is to make that combination uniquely interesting to you.

And now you have another cool Tool in your “Intentional Living Tool Box™.”

“Living Intentionally means you’ve become clear about the experience of life you want, and are actively making it so.”

By learning to quickly shift focus from seeing a barrier, to finding an “Access Point™,“ you intentionally shift your experience from a feeling of Weakness to an Experience of Control.

And learning to kick that burden to the curb using something already strong within you, gives you more power to live more intentionally.

Because A Happy Life Happens Intentionally™

and you get to make it so everyday.

Cheers,

PS: If you’re not already in The IL M, we open registration just a few times a year.

But You Can Jump in to our Free “Tools For Living” Mini-Series Experience Now!

I’m In For The Mini-Series!

You’ll get started learning how to live more intentionally, learn a variety of cool tools to help you live a happier life right now and have the first opportunity to join The ILM before it’s announced to the public.

I Can’t Wait To Meet You!

Cheers, Paul

The post How To Use What You Love, To Accomplish What You Don’t appeared first on The Power Of Intentional Living.

You’ll likely laugh at yourself, as I did. He will open your mind to how his simple method can powerfully create happiness in not only your own life, but in the lives of everyone you touch each day. 

The post Will Bowen: The Heart Of A Complaint Free World appeared first on The Power Of Intentional Living.

(so we need to use it where it counts)

One of the best uses of willpower is
to help boost us into a positive, sustainable habit.

We all struggle with willpower challenges. 

Whether we’re trying to avoid eating that tempting chocolate chip cookie on the table,

(I know, we both just pictured that), or not smoking another “something”…, we can all make a list of challenges to our willpower.

And it doesn’t take long to recognize that Willpower alone is not an effective strategy for creating lasting life improvement.

But when you get committed to eliminating a negative habit, the way you get started at embedding the new, positive habit is by using willpower as the tool to get you off the starting line.

Once you make the beneficial pattern your “normal” one, these behaviors then become the “default” behaviors.

Why?  Because your sub-conscious now regards the pattern as the status-quo, and it is built for keeping that in place.

So use it to your advantage. 

Once in place, a habit removes the “in your head” debate every time the relevant situation needs action. Your mind just executes the program and more often than not (no one’s perfect every time), you “Just Do It.” (as Nike would say).

Getting Over The Hump

What if on our way to establishing the good habit you’ve chosen, there was a way you could help disarm the impulse to do the unhelpful behavior? (a willpower cheat, so to speak)

Who would have thought?

Research into in the workings of willpower has discovered at least one effective way to help do exactly that:

Use a simple breathing technique to alter your brain chemistry.

And it only takes about two minutes!

 The body connected technique appears to cause your brain to insert what researchers call a “pause and plan” response into those tempting, or stressful situations.

And the longer we stay disconnected from the “negative habit default” impulse, (with it’s feeling we must act now or we’ll miss the immediate experience, opportunity, feeling, etc.) the more likely we’ll stick with our more conscious, beneficial desire. 

And we strengthen the new habit every time we do.

A Breath That Changes Your Mind (8 breaths, actually)

(Guided 3 Minute Breathing Meditation-You Can Download This Below To Have It On Your Phone, etc.)

Intentionally changing our physical behavior to alter how we feel has been tested in a wide variety of studies.

Another example is outlined by Amy Cuddy’s research on Power Poses. (see my Post – How You Stand, Will Change Your Mind – Amy Cuddy TED talk, under the “Inspiration” menu.)

This particular “body changing your mind” technique is a breathing approach. It is simple to learn, and so fast to do, (just a 3 minute escape/bathroom break), that it’s an easy way to quickly boost a willpower deficit or diffuse the anticipation of a willpower challenging situation.

Even better, the studies found it’s regular practice appears to make future choices even easier.

Here’s how it works: (but, do not do this while driving)
Adapted from a technique described by Kelly McGonigal, Ph.D. in her book The Willpower Instinct.

Sit in a comfortable position.

Close your eyes.

Focus on your breathing.

Now inhale fully and then, exhale evenly, counting to 15 over the next 15 seconds.

Then fully inhale and repeat this process again, until you complete 8 full exhales, which will cover about the next two minutes.

Stay focused on your breathing, counting from 1 – 15 over the single exhale, full to empty, each time.

When complete, before you open your eyes,  picture the positive result you prefer and feel the pleasure of enjoying it.

With that feeling present, open your eyes,

And you’re done!

Stay Present To Results

As you practice this technique, stay connected to how you feel after each 2 minute session.

People often express they are not only more relaxed, but feel more centered and more able to ignore stress or a craving call. (in just 2 minutes!).

The researchers discovered the more people used this simple breathing technique, the more often they experienced a reduced interest in the automatically triggered reaction or craving. ie. less willpower needed to say no and move on.

That feeling can allow you to put more energy into establishing the new habit you’re intentionally creating, more quickly embedding that better choice as your default.

A Little Help To Get You Started

To help you  train your body to this focused rhythm, I’ve created an audio to easily guide you through the breathing.

Download Your Willpower Breath Meditation Here!

It’s a free gift to help you get started faster.

Download it to your phone, so it’s always with you, or wherever works best for you.

Try it out over the next few days whenever you feel a craving or are anxious or stressed.

See what you find it does for you.

If you see results in just a few days of practice, use it anytime you feel tense, unfocused or distracted.

Build Your “Intentional Living Tool Box”

The more you get clear on the experience of life you want, you inevitably uncover areas in your way of being or lifestyle that are working against that experience.

Quality tools and perspectives can help you open your mind to accept the changes you want, faster.

Especially if they were designed to accelerate a change in an area they were specifically designed to transform.

One of my goals is to give you access to as many of these high quality “Intentional Living Tools” and techniques as possible.

That way you can have the right tool for the job, and more quickly re-align your results with the experience of life you want.  

This “pause and plan” response tool is one you can use immediately, at almost any time.

I use this simple technique myself and share it with friends to help them.

Now where’s that cookie?….. (so I can show it who’s in charge!)

Never stop moving forward.

Cheers,

To learn more about Willpower, I recommend listening to or reading the book: The Willpower Instinct by Kelly McGonigal, Ph.D. It’s filled with researched techniques and insights to help us                                                put our focus on what matters most to us.

You can check it out here:▽

“A Happy Life (only) Happens Intentionally™”
©️The Power Of Intentional Living – All Rights Reserved

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But habits only make your life better,
if you create ones that work for you.

This book shows you how.

When you feel like your daily life is disconnected from what moves you forward, one of the first places to look is at your habits.

The reality is, most of what we do each day, we do by unconscious habit.

So to get more harmony into the experience of life we want, we need to create habits that support a connected experience.

One of the very powerful “built in” tools we have is our habit system.

You can use this incredible system to your strategic advantage.

By intentionally creating your own habits, you can accelerate and automate the results you personally want to experience.

In his book, Superhuman By Habit, Tynan takes you through his journey, one that begins with him living a procrastinating, disorganized, start but never finish, lifestyle.

Realizing that his life was following a path to disappointment, he set out to learn how others had successfully created positive habits that helped make them successful.

The book, Superhuman By Habit, that resulted is a straight talking, fast paced series of teaching stories.

Each chapter provides defined, cause and effect recommendations designed to take you from wherever you are, to automating behaviors that support your chosen experience of life.

Good habits build great lives.

This book delivers multiple ways to help nudge you forward, one good habit at a time.
(It’s also available in audio form).

Let me know what new habits you’ve created. I’d love to hear.

Cheers,

The post Superhuman By Habit – Using Habits To Become The Best Version Of You appeared first on The Power Of Intentional Living.

The best way to start moving in the direction you choose, is by learning new ways to work more effectively.

In his best selling book, called Smarter, Faster, Better, Charles Duhigg, Pulitzer Prize winning reporter for the New York Times, gives you a variety of techniques and ideas that help you do just that.

Here’s a bit about what drove him to write this now best selling book:

Excerpt from Charles Duhigg.com/about:

“Productivity, put simply, is the name we give our attempts to figure out the best uses of our energy, intellect, and time as we try to seize the most meaningful rewards with the least wasted effort. It’s a process of learning how to succeed with less stress and struggle. It’s about getting things done without sacrificing everything we care about along the way….”

“At that moment, I realized two things:

First, I was clearly doing something wrong because I hadn’t taken a day off in nine months; in fact, I was growing worried that, given a choice between their father and the babysitter, my kids would pick the sitter.

Second, and more important, there were people out there who knew how to be more productive. I just had to convince them to share their secrets with me.”

Sound familiar? Pick even one idea from this book, use it and you could live more successfully.

To match your learning style, this book is available in both print and Audible formats.

Here’s the link to take a look. As always, let me know what you think.

Never stop moving forward.

Cheers,

The post Smarter, Faster, Better: The Secrets Of Being Productive In Life appeared first on The Power Of Intentional Living.

.

But we can intentionally create and substitute new habits that will support our new goals powerfully.

Rubin’s engaging research shows us how to install lasting changes with just a small amount of willpower required at the start.

An insightful and valuable tool to help us embed positive change quickly.

All the best, Paul

Text below from Amazon.com:

The author of the blockbuster New York Times bestsellers, The Happiness Project and Happier at Home, tackles the critical question: How do we change? 

Gretchen Rubin’s answer: through habits. Habits are the invisible architecture of everyday life. It takes work to make a habit, but once that habit is set, we can harness the energy of habits to build happier, stronger, more productive lives.

So if habits are a key to change, then what we really need to know is: How do we change our habits?

Better than Before answers that question. It presents a practical, concrete framework to allow readers to understand their habits—and to change them for good. Infused with Rubin’s compelling voice, rigorous research, and easy humor, and packed with vivid stories of lives transformed, Better than Before explains the (sometimes counter-intuitive) core principles of habit formation.

Along the way, Rubin uses herself as guinea pig, tests her theories on family and friends, and answers readers’ most pressing questions—oddly, questions that other writers and researchers tend to ignore:

• Why do I find it tough to create a habit for something I love to do?
• Sometimes I can change a habit overnight, and sometimes I can’t change a habit, no matter how hard I try. Why?
• How quickly can I change a habit?
• What can I do to make sure I stick to a new habit?
• How can I help someone else change a habit?
• Why can I keep habits that benefit others, but can’t make habits that are just for me?

Whether readers want to get more sleep, stop checking their devices, maintain a healthy weight, or finish an important project, habits make change possible. Reading just a few chapters of Better Than Before will make readers eager to start work on their own habits—even before they’ve finished the book. (from the publishers)

Start building habits that turn using your strengths into automatic behaviors. 

Live A Life That Loves You Back.™

.

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“Work Is A Purpose, Not A Place.” Tom Rath

One of the most powerful opportunities we gain by knowing the details behind our strengths, is the ability to connect what we do to our reason for being. 

As Tom Rath clearly explains in this moving book, a fulfilling life is lived at the intersection of three key elements:

1. What you want to do.  (your interests) 2. The needs of others and the world.  (needs)  3. What you are good at. (your natural strengths)

In this book, Rath helps us quickly get clear about what creates fulfillment in life:

Fulfillment grows when we create our lives within the intersection of our natural strengths, our personal interests and the needs of others.

Using his data driven orientation, he presents abundant evidence that this is a fact, not just a nice idea. A very valuable, highly inspiring book. – Paul

Text below from Amazon.com

“Are You Fully Charged?” Tom Rath’s latest international bestseller (6th WSJ/NYT bestseller, over 6 million copies sold) reveals the three keys that matter most for our daily well-being, as well as our engagement in our work.

Drawing on the latest and most practical research from business, psychology, and economics, this book focuses on changes we can make to create better days for ourselves and others.

Are You Fully Charged? will challenge you to stop pursuing happiness and start creating meaning instead, lead you to rethink your daily interactions with the people who matter most, and show you how to put your own health first in order to be your best every day.

“Are You Fully Charged?” by Tom Rath –  Available Now!

The post Are You Fully Charged? – Proven Ways To Live A Life That Fulfills appeared first on The Power Of Intentional Living.

Fully Charged – by Tom Rath & David Martin

The post Fully Charged – The Film by Tom Rath and David Martin appeared first on The Power Of Intentional Living.

The Happiness Project: Or, Why I Spent a Year Trying to Sing in the Morning, Clean My Closets, Fight Right, Read Aristotle, and Generally Have More Fun

——————————————————

“A wonderful exploration of what makes us happy and what we can all do to keep it rockin’ in our own lives! Lots of smiles just reading it.” Cheers, Paul

Subscribe

Text below from Amazon.com

Gretchen Rubin had an epiphany one rainy afternoon in the unlikeliest of places: a city bus. “The days are long, but the years are short,” she realized. “Time is passing, and I’m not focusing enough on the things that really matter.” In that moment, she decided to dedicate a year to her happiness project.

In this lively and compelling account, Rubin chronicles her adventures during the twelve months she spent test-driving the wisdom of the ages, current scientific research, and lessons from popular culture about how to be happier.

Among other things, she found that novelty and challenge are powerful sources of happiness; that money can help buy happiness, when spent wisely; that outer order contributes to inner calm; and that the very smallest of changes can make the biggest difference.

The post The Happiness Project – By Gretchen Rubin appeared first on The Power Of Intentional Living.